The least offensive way to desecrate a corpse is to push its butt cheeks together and bun-fuck it, cumming all over its skanky little tramp-stamp.

you could say my lifes a downward spiral, but that would mean it has direction and some kind of momentum

He whos shit does not stink is probably actually jerking off, not shitting.

if there's one thing that hotdogs have taught us its that animal testicles become amazingly palatable in their new cylindrical form.

Confucius says: It's the bent pickle that stays in jar!

The harder you wipe, the less work you'll have in the shower.