I'd hit that like a ping pong ball (i.e. with 1 to 3 other Chinese guys)

I'd hit that like Heino!
("Nehmen Sie meinen giftig lange Klapperschlager, Hüüüüüüündin!)

I'd sex her like an 18-22 week ultrasound!

I'd [come on/in] her like [the water's fine!]

I'd bang into that, like an Aussie going up the left side of the staircase, right after the bell rings for lunch at Sarah Lawrence College.

I'd rail that like an unsafe staircase.

I'd hit that quicker than the next McNeezy post.